Ohhhhhhkay. Last night I had a date with Alfie. We got really drunk. Strike that. He got me really drunk. Today, I have a wine hangover. And a life hangover.
Yesterday, I was going crazy with nerves about the date. Today, he's a normal man again. I don't know what it is. Something about seeing a guy in just his socks really makes you realise he's only human.
Last night I met a local celebrity, who told me that Alfie was a great guy. And I felt like I was with one. I'd been quite calm getting ready for the date. Except that I came on my period and woke up with an outcrop of spots inhabiting my chin. Perfect timing.
What I've learned from this experience? Alcohol and poor judgement really do go hand in hand! And, always have an alibi in place before your boyfriend wakes up your entire family because you haven't come home yet! My mother knows. My mother! (My sister is a big grass!)
Yes, I stayed at his place. But that didn't happen. We just fooled around. Then I asked him to call me a taxi. But he put his arms around me and asked me to stay. I fell asleep with him holding me and telling me my body was amazing.
(Why do things seem perfectly reasonable when you're drunk? I told him I didn't want to stay over because I hated the thought of going home in the same clothes the next morning and he was like "I'll lend you a t-shirt." As if I could go home wearing another man's t-shirt, but it seemed perfectly plausible at the time. I'm telling you kids, alcohol is wicked. In the bad sense of the word.)
But this morning, everything looked different. Seedy. I'll never do it again.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment