As if! Who do you think I am, Tracey Emin?
Even though it happened ages ago and I haven’t even been to see it yet, while I’m on the topic I just have to big up her sculpture near Liverpool’s Anglican Cathedral, cos it’s not like you see a little bird sitting on top of a pole every facking day! Gawd. She’s mad, I like her. And, it could have been worse.
So, last night we had a Big Brother party. We made lots of yummy food, drank wine, and prepared for jaw-dropping vulgarity. We weren't disappointed. The most normal person in there is a self-described black, gay, fox-hunting Tory, with a deep love of Margaret Thatcher! But that's judging from their auditions. The way to pass a Big Brother audition it seems, is to be as OTT as possible, and I reckon most of them will settle down once they're in there. For those of you not in the least bit interested in Big Brother, I apologise. It's my summer obsession.
I got feedback from my tutor today about some work I sent him, and now I really have to get down to business. This feels really weird, since normally at this time of year I've just got all my work out of the way and am looking forward to summer. Boooo, I say.
Saturday, May 28, 2005
Thursday, May 26, 2005
We are the Champions!
So, yesterday, The Best Thing Ever happened. From nowhere, I suddenly fancy Steven Gerrard. I've no idea why. I have heard nothing but match analysis all day, tempted as I am I won't repeat it here. There were too many highlights anyway, and I suspect Guillermo will tell it better. It was such an exciting final. I don't know how the fuck we managed it. Respect to Dudek for that double save, though I'm not sure he knew what was happening :P My dad has no voice today from screaming at the telly. My boyfriend has the hangover from Hell. There were fireworks in the streets last night, and I'm off to the parade in a bit! Should be good!
Today I went to hospital for some balance and hearing tests. The balance tests involve marching on the spot with your arms outstretched and your eyes closed; the doc performs this merry little dance opposite you at first and then wanders around going "Keep doing it until I say stop." (Heard that one before!) I think he uses the time to finish his crossword, maybe scoff a quick sarnie. I don't think he took me very seriously as I found it all very amusing. He was nice though. Apparently, if I can dance I'm doing very well. He's obviously never seen me dance then. Bruce spaghetti legs Grobbelaar has nothing on me ;) (I'm joking! I put Beyonce to shame! Kind of...)
More on the parade later!
Today I went to hospital for some balance and hearing tests. The balance tests involve marching on the spot with your arms outstretched and your eyes closed; the doc performs this merry little dance opposite you at first and then wanders around going "Keep doing it until I say stop." (Heard that one before!) I think he uses the time to finish his crossword, maybe scoff a quick sarnie. I don't think he took me very seriously as I found it all very amusing. He was nice though. Apparently, if I can dance I'm doing very well. He's obviously never seen me dance then. Bruce spaghetti legs Grobbelaar has nothing on me ;) (I'm joking! I put Beyonce to shame! Kind of...)
More on the parade later!
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
A Pregnant Pause
No, I'm not. But I am surrounded by friends who are having babies or really want them. My niece is having one. A boy. I'm going to be a great-aunt, and my sister, who is an absolute nutter, much like one of these outlandish people that escape from reality TV shows, will be a granny! Said niece has also just moved into her own place. She went and bought a three piece suite the other day, and uttered this sentence: "Do you know what I love? Dettol." She's 18! One of my good friends is also having her second child. I am constantly hearing about scans, tiredness, swollen limbs, etc. The pregnant friends are delighted, and the non-pregnant friends are or would be jealous. Am I weird, or does having a baby seem incredibly scary and undesirable?
Maybe it's my age (even though said friends are either just a couple of years older or younger than me), or maybe it's the fact that I share a wall with the screaming child family. This tribe has produced four kids in the space of just over one year. I tell you, I am scared to drink the water. The optimum location for hearing the sobs and cries of the four kids that visit my neighbours A LOT is our bathroom. The structure separating our house and theirs has long been christened the Wailing Wall. This is because not only do we get wonderful acoustics where the brats are concerned, but are treated to hardcore rap from the neighbour's sound system whenever any of us decide to have a lovely relaxing soak in the tub. Today, neighbour decided on a little change though. He put on Robert Miles, Children. I shit you not.
And next month, I have my baby cousin Jack Jack's christening to go to. All the children in our family in one room, along with Judas (the cousin I grew up with and was basically inseparable from; the clue is in the name) and Dick (the bro in law who says no more boys for me!) Joy!
Maybe it's my age (even though said friends are either just a couple of years older or younger than me), or maybe it's the fact that I share a wall with the screaming child family. This tribe has produced four kids in the space of just over one year. I tell you, I am scared to drink the water. The optimum location for hearing the sobs and cries of the four kids that visit my neighbours A LOT is our bathroom. The structure separating our house and theirs has long been christened the Wailing Wall. This is because not only do we get wonderful acoustics where the brats are concerned, but are treated to hardcore rap from the neighbour's sound system whenever any of us decide to have a lovely relaxing soak in the tub. Today, neighbour decided on a little change though. He put on Robert Miles, Children. I shit you not.
And next month, I have my baby cousin Jack Jack's christening to go to. All the children in our family in one room, along with Judas (the cousin I grew up with and was basically inseparable from; the clue is in the name) and Dick (the bro in law who says no more boys for me!) Joy!
Monday, May 23, 2005
My brain and my speech look drunker than I really am
Ah the weekend, dontcha just love 'em? Saturday night was so much fun! Our original plans were to go to the Sports Bar and watch the football, but my boyfriend had been a bit too liberal with pouring the old booze down his gullet the night before and woke up with the words "My kidneys hurt," on his lips. (I hadn't even been kicking him that hard.) He didn't even drink that much, ladies and gentlemen, as he explained himself before I sent him off to bed: "My brain and my speech look drunker than I really am." Watching football sans-alcohol seemed a bit pointless, if not against male law, so we went out for dinner instead.
We hit the tapas bar first and I had some yummy sangria, then we went for our meal and had a really funny waiter asking us if we were going 'on the razzle-dazzle'. The poor love was working a 13-hour shift. He had a cool haircut. Boyfriend also flicked tomato all over himself and the waitress suggested a bib next time. We were onto the red wine by this point, getting swiftly merry.
Onto Modo and the Office, then Baa Baa where we were outrageously ripped off. £3 a Reef! What! If you get there before 9 o'clock it's £2 for a bottle and a shot. It was five past :( Then we headed to the Tea Factory. Lots of people in fab outfits everywhere, I can't help it, it's what I notice most. Some people were in less fab outfits but most of these were either on hen nights or looking like they'd come adrift from one. The two girls in matching short tartan skirts and black tops, I'm talking to you :P oh okay, about you. I didn't look too clever myself when my stiletto got stuck in a crack in the pavement in Bold Street and I walked straight out of it. Boyf thought this rather more funny than it actually was, but it's a good job he was there as it required super-human strength to get it back out again.
All in all, we didn't dance much due to lack of other people dancing, but it was a good gossipy night and we put the world to rights. Boyfriend talks rather too loudly when he's drunk though, as in these gems: "Let's move, they stink," "Why do we always get the weirdos?" and "She's not even nice looking," when I said the waitress was pretty. This also prompted accusations of lesbianism and suggestions that I was up for a threesome. Men are so predictable.
We hit the tapas bar first and I had some yummy sangria, then we went for our meal and had a really funny waiter asking us if we were going 'on the razzle-dazzle'. The poor love was working a 13-hour shift. He had a cool haircut. Boyfriend also flicked tomato all over himself and the waitress suggested a bib next time. We were onto the red wine by this point, getting swiftly merry.
Onto Modo and the Office, then Baa Baa where we were outrageously ripped off. £3 a Reef! What! If you get there before 9 o'clock it's £2 for a bottle and a shot. It was five past :( Then we headed to the Tea Factory. Lots of people in fab outfits everywhere, I can't help it, it's what I notice most. Some people were in less fab outfits but most of these were either on hen nights or looking like they'd come adrift from one. The two girls in matching short tartan skirts and black tops, I'm talking to you :P oh okay, about you. I didn't look too clever myself when my stiletto got stuck in a crack in the pavement in Bold Street and I walked straight out of it. Boyf thought this rather more funny than it actually was, but it's a good job he was there as it required super-human strength to get it back out again.
All in all, we didn't dance much due to lack of other people dancing, but it was a good gossipy night and we put the world to rights. Boyfriend talks rather too loudly when he's drunk though, as in these gems: "Let's move, they stink," "Why do we always get the weirdos?" and "She's not even nice looking," when I said the waitress was pretty. This also prompted accusations of lesbianism and suggestions that I was up for a threesome. Men are so predictable.
Friday, May 20, 2005
Kids say the funniest things, Part Deux
I know I said I hate kids ya’ll, but sometimes you have to love them for pure comedy value. Plus, this kid happens to be my niece, who, despite being the spawn of Satan (my bro in law... let's call him Dick, is on a mission to ruin my life - like the Murphy’s, I’m not bitter), is adorable.
Little Dude: I can count to a hundred!
Me: (realising my mistake as the words tumbled out of my stupid gob) Really? Can you? Go on then.
Voice in my Head: NOOOOOO! WHY?!!!!!
LD: ooooone, twoooooo, threeeeee, foooooour.……. (several minutes later) thirty-twooooo, thirty-threeeeee, thirty-
Me: Can you count in tens?
Also in the same encounter, Surreal Sentences 101:
LD: Guess what? We saw a dead pancake by the park, and Chantelle/Demi/Stacey touched it! (matter-of-factly) It’s cos she wants to be a vet.
FYI: She calls magpies ‘pancakes’, and we have absolutely no clue as to why.
Little Dude: I can count to a hundred!
Me: (realising my mistake as the words tumbled out of my stupid gob) Really? Can you? Go on then.
Voice in my Head: NOOOOOO! WHY?!!!!!
LD: ooooone, twoooooo, threeeeee, foooooour.……. (several minutes later) thirty-twooooo, thirty-threeeeee, thirty-
Me: Can you count in tens?
Also in the same encounter, Surreal Sentences 101:
LD: Guess what? We saw a dead pancake by the park, and Chantelle/Demi/Stacey touched it! (matter-of-factly) It’s cos she wants to be a vet.
FYI: She calls magpies ‘pancakes’, and we have absolutely no clue as to why.
Thursday, May 19, 2005
Every Day I Love You Less and Less
Although I understand it’s difficult for anyone but me to appreciate the staggering nature of this next disclosure, I’m gonna relate it here anyhow. It all started with Guillermo sending me a Kaiser Chiefs song. I have to reference him or he’ll be all sulky, apparently he has some sort of musical taste property rights over me now :P Anyway, they played it on Ant & Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway (he may want to distance himself from this paragraph now actually), and I was like: Ooooh Kaiser Chiefs.
Which prompted a chorus of: What? Who’s this? You like this?! Look at the state of them! Oh, I can’t BELIEVE you like these!
From my boyfriend. Fast forward to about two weeks later. We’re walking around the Dam with Puppy. The sun is glinting pleasantly off the water. We haven’t spotted one used hypodermic needle. It’s a beautiful thing.
Boyfriend: (sings) ohhhhh, and my parents love me, ohhhhh and my girlfriend loves me… I love that song, it’s dead catchy!
Even if you don’t know Kaiser Chiefs, I think you get where I’m going with this.
Word of the Day: Incredulity
Which prompted a chorus of: What? Who’s this? You like this?! Look at the state of them! Oh, I can’t BELIEVE you like these!
From my boyfriend. Fast forward to about two weeks later. We’re walking around the Dam with Puppy. The sun is glinting pleasantly off the water. We haven’t spotted one used hypodermic needle. It’s a beautiful thing.
Boyfriend: (sings) ohhhhh, and my parents love me, ohhhhh and my girlfriend loves me… I love that song, it’s dead catchy!
Even if you don’t know Kaiser Chiefs, I think you get where I’m going with this.
Word of the Day: Incredulity
A Staple Diet
My mother is a fantastic cook. However, her eye sight is not 100%. Strange things found in our dinners include: a cigarette butt - no, really - and, just recently, a staple in my omelette. Okay, not in my omelette, amongst the potatoes, but it disturbs me that it could have been in my omelette. And she made the staple diet joke, perfectly unconcerned. Is she trying to do me serious harm? Is this why, when bees or wasps chased me as a child, she advised me to stand still? (This last bit is stolen from an Eddie Izzard joke. A very funny man, and rather sexy actually :P)
I'd also just like to make note of a wonderful compliment I received from Guillermo, you know, for posterity. And I quote: "You aren't as stupid as you make out to be when it comes to computers." Oh, harps. Angels. Birds twittering.
I'd also just like to make note of a wonderful compliment I received from Guillermo, you know, for posterity. And I quote: "You aren't as stupid as you make out to be when it comes to computers." Oh, harps. Angels. Birds twittering.
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
Shopping in the Holocene
First up, apologies for the last very self-indulgent post. I love those things though! I loved it until half way through at least and then I wanted a meteor to crash into the Earth or something so I could stop. You don't understand, there was no other way I was stopping! Well, maybe if Jeremy Edwards walked into my room looking like he does on my desktop (for the ladies) I'd Save as Draft. But what are the chances of that? By the way, he owns like the cutest dog ever [edit: this statement naturally excludes my puppy, as really it would be unfair for any dog to try and compete.] I may add a pic at some point in the near future. (Yes, I know, all very adolescent of me!)
I'm aiming for speed here since I have a lot to do and it didn't help staying up until 4 last night. Stoopid me. I got a letter this morning acknowledging one of my many job applications. Yay! They do know I'm alive! Apart from that I had to email some work to my tutor the other day, and am awaiting a potentially brutal response. Excuses, I have lots :P I am in fact a connoisseur.
Last Thursday also saw skipping of work and a drive to Sunny Manchester. (It actually was sunny, I'm not being sarcastic.) There I spent a fortune and would like to initiate a campaign to get our H&M to be more like theirs. Ours is literally like a jumble sale. Me and my friends call it Hit & Miss cos you're very unlikely to find anything nice in there. But in Manchester? A shopper's paradise! I was gutted to run out of money in there, but it's probably a good thing. Something strange and worrying is happening to me, demonstrated nice and succinctly by this exchange:
Boyf: Wanna go to Harvey Nichols?
Me: Nah, let's just find Primark.
What? Did I say that?! Yes my friends, I'm turning into my mother.
I'm aiming for speed here since I have a lot to do and it didn't help staying up until 4 last night. Stoopid me. I got a letter this morning acknowledging one of my many job applications. Yay! They do know I'm alive! Apart from that I had to email some work to my tutor the other day, and am awaiting a potentially brutal response. Excuses, I have lots :P I am in fact a connoisseur.
Last Thursday also saw skipping of work and a drive to Sunny Manchester. (It actually was sunny, I'm not being sarcastic.) There I spent a fortune and would like to initiate a campaign to get our H&M to be more like theirs. Ours is literally like a jumble sale. Me and my friends call it Hit & Miss cos you're very unlikely to find anything nice in there. But in Manchester? A shopper's paradise! I was gutted to run out of money in there, but it's probably a good thing. Something strange and worrying is happening to me, demonstrated nice and succinctly by this exchange:
Boyf: Wanna go to Harvey Nichols?
Me: Nah, let's just find Primark.
What? Did I say that?! Yes my friends, I'm turning into my mother.
Monday, May 16, 2005
No Time to Lose
... and yet! My friend David sent me this with his answers so it got me thinking about mine. Here they are, ready or not:
Ten random things about me:
10 - I type with one hand
9 - I talk to my dog in baby language and make up silly names for him (he looks on in contempt, but wags anyway :))
8 - I often daydream about a different life
7 - I hate wooden kitchen utensils... think nails scratching across a chalkboard *shudder*
6 - I can't swim but I love the sea
5 - Shopping makes me happy - no! never! I hear you cry
4 - I hate calling people and, boyfy excluded, only do so if absolutely necessary/a friend is upset/I will go to gaol if I don't
3 - Bizarre but true: when I'm angry/upset, I sing in the shower (sorry neighbours)
2 - I'm very proud to be my grandfather's granddaughter :) even though I used to stamp on his foot when I was little and think it was hilarious
1 - I know all the words to the theme tune of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air... who doesn't?
Nine ways to win my heart:
9 - Be my friend
8 - Buy me something pretty, hehe
7 - Share my enthusiasm for Big Brother... ahem
6 - Sing to me whether you can sing or not, or leave musical voicemails on my phone :)
5 - Make me feel safe
4 - Be addicted to texting
3 - Love to travel, and take me with you :) (I'm talking road trips, not Barbados)
2 - Be spontaneous and love life (I once willed someone to turn back in his car, drive to uni and kiss me in the library stacks :P)
1 - Avoid slobbery kissing! Eeeew.
Eight things I carry/wear every day:
8 - Make Poverty History wristband - buy it now!
7 - A smile :)
6 - The ring my boyf bought me for passing my A' levels
5 - Cute pictures of my nieces in my purse
4 - Inevitably, old cinema tickets... they're everywhere!
3 - Blusher. Sometimes I overdo it and look like Aunt Sally, but I don't care!
2 - Mobile phone - handy for texting and snapping pics of, for example, celebs you may spot wandering around town. If only they'd been invented when I saw Tim Vincent in Pizza Hut! He does a Specsavers ad now :P
1 - In winter, a scarf, in summer, funky sunglasses which I always break!
Seven things that annoy me:
7 - Prejudice
6 - SpongeBob SquarePants... why?
5 - Being treated like a doormat by people who I cared about
4 - People who are rude to waitresses/waiters, and general rudeness or people on power trips... seven isn't enough :P
3 - Bitchy shop assistants. There are shops I avoid cos the girls are snotty and ones I go to cos I like the people.
2 - Kids. I hate 'em. Grow up and get a job already :P
1 - Smoking
Six places I've visited or intend to:
HAVE VISITED:
6 - Greece
5 - Portugal, where I lost my boyfriend to Superbock beer :P
4 - France France France
3 - Menorca - Son Bou Beach!
2 - Berlin
1 - Buckingham Palace, picnic on Liz's lawn no less :)
INTEND TO/DREAM OF:
6 - New York. Massive Surprise
5 - European Cities: Rome, Copenhagen, Prague
4 - New Orleans
3 - Canada
2 - Japan
1 - Maldives/Mauritius/Hawaii
Five things I want to do before I die:
5 - Visit all the places mentioned above, and then some
4 - Adopt a child (I figure I won't hate my own)
3 - Win an Oscar, or at least go to the ceremony looking glam :)
2 - Live in a gorgeous house by the sea
1 - Have a job that I love
Four things I'm afraid of:
4 - Flying :( A major spanner in the works
3 - Rejection, despite mucho experience :P Actually, I think I'm more scared of spiders...
2 - Getting old
1 - Death... but that's a given? The C word
Three things I do every day:
3 - Say "I love you" to someone I love
2 - Write
1 - Be late for something
Two things I'm trying not to do now:
2 - Procrastinate... going soooooooo well
1 - Worry
One person I want to see now:
1 - My lovely boyf :)
Ten random things about me:
10 - I type with one hand
9 - I talk to my dog in baby language and make up silly names for him (he looks on in contempt, but wags anyway :))
8 - I often daydream about a different life
7 - I hate wooden kitchen utensils... think nails scratching across a chalkboard *shudder*
6 - I can't swim but I love the sea
5 - Shopping makes me happy - no! never! I hear you cry
4 - I hate calling people and, boyfy excluded, only do so if absolutely necessary/a friend is upset/I will go to gaol if I don't
3 - Bizarre but true: when I'm angry/upset, I sing in the shower (sorry neighbours)
2 - I'm very proud to be my grandfather's granddaughter :) even though I used to stamp on his foot when I was little and think it was hilarious
1 - I know all the words to the theme tune of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air... who doesn't?
Nine ways to win my heart:
9 - Be my friend
8 - Buy me something pretty, hehe
7 - Share my enthusiasm for Big Brother... ahem
6 - Sing to me whether you can sing or not, or leave musical voicemails on my phone :)
5 - Make me feel safe
4 - Be addicted to texting
3 - Love to travel, and take me with you :) (I'm talking road trips, not Barbados)
2 - Be spontaneous and love life (I once willed someone to turn back in his car, drive to uni and kiss me in the library stacks :P)
1 - Avoid slobbery kissing! Eeeew.
Eight things I carry/wear every day:
8 - Make Poverty History wristband - buy it now!
7 - A smile :)
6 - The ring my boyf bought me for passing my A' levels
5 - Cute pictures of my nieces in my purse
4 - Inevitably, old cinema tickets... they're everywhere!
3 - Blusher. Sometimes I overdo it and look like Aunt Sally, but I don't care!
2 - Mobile phone - handy for texting and snapping pics of, for example, celebs you may spot wandering around town. If only they'd been invented when I saw Tim Vincent in Pizza Hut! He does a Specsavers ad now :P
1 - In winter, a scarf, in summer, funky sunglasses which I always break!
Seven things that annoy me:
7 - Prejudice
6 - SpongeBob SquarePants... why?
5 - Being treated like a doormat by people who I cared about
4 - People who are rude to waitresses/waiters, and general rudeness or people on power trips... seven isn't enough :P
3 - Bitchy shop assistants. There are shops I avoid cos the girls are snotty and ones I go to cos I like the people.
2 - Kids. I hate 'em. Grow up and get a job already :P
1 - Smoking
Six places I've visited or intend to:
HAVE VISITED:
6 - Greece
5 - Portugal, where I lost my boyfriend to Superbock beer :P
4 - France France France
3 - Menorca - Son Bou Beach!
2 - Berlin
1 - Buckingham Palace, picnic on Liz's lawn no less :)
INTEND TO/DREAM OF:
6 - New York. Massive Surprise
5 - European Cities: Rome, Copenhagen, Prague
4 - New Orleans
3 - Canada
2 - Japan
1 - Maldives/Mauritius/Hawaii
Five things I want to do before I die:
5 - Visit all the places mentioned above, and then some
4 - Adopt a child (I figure I won't hate my own)
3 - Win an Oscar, or at least go to the ceremony looking glam :)
2 - Live in a gorgeous house by the sea
1 - Have a job that I love
Four things I'm afraid of:
4 - Flying :( A major spanner in the works
3 - Rejection, despite mucho experience :P Actually, I think I'm more scared of spiders...
2 - Getting old
1 - Death... but that's a given? The C word
Three things I do every day:
3 - Say "I love you" to someone I love
2 - Write
1 - Be late for something
Two things I'm trying not to do now:
2 - Procrastinate... going soooooooo well
1 - Worry
One person I want to see now:
1 - My lovely boyf :)
Sunday, May 15, 2005
Spelling Bee Dumb
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid: aoccdrnig to rseearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt.
Yeah, I'm totally thieving from other people's blogs. You love it!
Word of the Day: Pilfer :)
Yeah, I'm totally thieving from other people's blogs. You love it!
Word of the Day: Pilfer :)
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Amity & Enmity
"...together in perfect harmony."
So far today I am mostly:- listening to Marvin Gaye. Quote from Zadie Smith, for making Guillermo smile purposes: "What a voice... It's like God took Stevie's honey and poured it over gravel." Zadie Smith, The Autograph Man, (London: Penguin, 2003. First published 2002), p.135. Footnotes are my life.
Lots of stuff between posts, but can't be bothered blogging most of it! Have acquired a new mortal enemy, a surprising one this time, though you hardly ever expect them. Tip of the day, that one. Saw Amityville Horror the other night, starring Melissa George AKA Angel from Home & Away. It was quite cheesy but effective. The general test for how scary a film has been is whether, after turning off the light, you RUN across the landing into your bedroom and hurriedly close the door behind you. This didn't happen, but I did run to switch it ON.
Took Puppy to the woods yesterday. It was a really nice evening but we did go a bit over the top on the old hiking and did about four miles. For the first half mile Puppy carried his lead in his mouth, tugging like crazy occasionally to be set free. He looks alternately like he's taking his darn self for a walk thank you very much, or like he's swallowed his lead. Eventually we let him off for a run and he ran straight into a marsh and got muddy up to his belly. Well done there Pup. On the plus side, he didn't bite any other dogs face! Progress!
Word of the Day: Spurious
So far today I am mostly:- listening to Marvin Gaye. Quote from Zadie Smith, for making Guillermo smile purposes: "What a voice... It's like God took Stevie's honey and poured it over gravel." Zadie Smith, The Autograph Man, (London: Penguin, 2003. First published 2002), p.135. Footnotes are my life.
Lots of stuff between posts, but can't be bothered blogging most of it! Have acquired a new mortal enemy, a surprising one this time, though you hardly ever expect them. Tip of the day, that one. Saw Amityville Horror the other night, starring Melissa George AKA Angel from Home & Away. It was quite cheesy but effective. The general test for how scary a film has been is whether, after turning off the light, you RUN across the landing into your bedroom and hurriedly close the door behind you. This didn't happen, but I did run to switch it ON.
Took Puppy to the woods yesterday. It was a really nice evening but we did go a bit over the top on the old hiking and did about four miles. For the first half mile Puppy carried his lead in his mouth, tugging like crazy occasionally to be set free. He looks alternately like he's taking his darn self for a walk thank you very much, or like he's swallowed his lead. Eventually we let him off for a run and he ran straight into a marsh and got muddy up to his belly. Well done there Pup. On the plus side, he didn't bite any other dogs face! Progress!
Word of the Day: Spurious
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
Big Apple
Today I am mostly:- green with envy! My dad got back from New York today and now I really wanna go. Stoopid fear of flying! He - a man who hates shopping more than I hate the UK Style channel - actually went shopping for gifts and bought me a cute pair of pink Timberland boots, and a Macy's bag! He met Fergie while he was there, and she was lovely. She chatted to him and my uncle and offered to pose for a photo, yay to Fergie! There also exists a photograph of my dad, MY DAD! with his arm around Christian Slater! I've seen it, Christian Slater is hotter than I thought! [edit: Film Quote: "All I want to do is graduate from high school, move to Europe, marry Christian Slater, and die!" They showed the Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie, with Kristy Swanson and Luke Perry, on TV the other night. Hilary Swank's in it too. Like, so totally retro.]
They did all the usual sight seeing and went on a Helicopter ride. They got involved in this United for Peace rally in Central Park too, forming part of a human peace symbol that was photographed from space! My dad is the coolest cat in town! And - and this is perhaps the ultimate reason for my jealousy - they had the nicest cheesecake in the world sitting on the bleachers in the sun in Central Park. It sounds brilliant!
As for me back in old Blighty... all I did was go see the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, I just can't compete! "So long, and thanks for all the fish."
Word of the Day: Vicarious
They did all the usual sight seeing and went on a Helicopter ride. They got involved in this United for Peace rally in Central Park too, forming part of a human peace symbol that was photographed from space! My dad is the coolest cat in town! And - and this is perhaps the ultimate reason for my jealousy - they had the nicest cheesecake in the world sitting on the bleachers in the sun in Central Park. It sounds brilliant!
As for me back in old Blighty... all I did was go see the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, I just can't compete! "So long, and thanks for all the fish."
Word of the Day: Vicarious
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